


Ball of Memories

by thinkwritexpress



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies), Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Coworkers to lovers, Cute fluffy romance, Don't copy to another site, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Spock's sister, Starship Enterprise (Star Trek), Vulcan Culture, Vulcan Kisses, Vulcan!reader, fancy ball, it's a party - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-26
Updated: 2019-12-26
Packaged: 2021-02-26 01:54:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,926
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21975439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thinkwritexpress/pseuds/thinkwritexpress
Summary: You take time to reflect on your relationship with Jim Kirk before attending a financier's gala to drum up funds for more voyages on the Enterprise.Aka Jim is very tactile, especially knowing how much it means for a Vulcan partner while in a formal setting being very subtly inappropriate.
Relationships: Jim Kirk/OFC, Jim Kirk/Reader, Jim Kirk/You
Kudos: 25





	Ball of Memories

**Author's Note:**

> This was a work requested by theweepingvulcan91 on tumblr! The reader is Spock's sister. Let me know what you think!

As you get ready for your evening with Jim and the people of Starfleet, you look back on your relationship with the captain, a fond feeling settling over you as you remember how courting Jim Kirk took far more time than most would expect.

Upon your first meeting, you knew you desired him, and you thought he had felt something similar. However, as soon as your brother Spock stepped up to welcome you to the _Enterprise_ , Jim had stepped back and become almost coldly professional, far more distant with you than with any other crew member on the ship.

Though you knew immediately what you felt for him, Jim was hesitant to admit or try anything. Your human emotions stung- at first, you thought he was outright rejecting you and didn’t want you, something you had never dealt with. Despite being half-human, you had still been desirable to many of the Vulcans on your home planet, and many had tried to connect with you on multiple levels. Determined not to let Jim’s dismissal of you ruin your much-anticipated time on the _Enterprise,_ you did your best to shut off any feelings except respect for the captain, and went about your duties, ignoring how your heart quickened around him. After accepting that your feelings were not reciprocated, you took a different route and pushed to be friends, wanting a similar connection that he shared with your brother, wanting anything more than the coldness he regarded you with at that moment.

Slowly, after much pushing and coaxing, Jim warmed up to you considerably, though there was still a sense of him holding something back. You refused to let that discourage you from your friendship with the captain though, content with the progress you had made. Friendship was the first step in a long road you hadn’t even thought of starting down.

~~~~

One shore-leave night, a few years after first deploying with the _Enterprise_ , you put your responsibilities on hold for the next few days and allowed yourself to get a little too inebriated. Spock would have been ashamed, had he seen, but he wasn’t around, and you didn’t care. At least, not while this drunk.

You still had control over your body, able to walk in a… fairly straight line, and weren’t stumbling around, though your inhibitions were down and emotions running more freely than usual. You desperately began searching for your captain, your Jim, needing to see him, your pent-up feelings for him coming to the surface an an inescapable bubbling-over. You found him strolling along a path in a nearby garden, and you nearly swooned. He looked so perfect, hair highlighted by the moonlight, and you paused a moment to admire him, only to have your location revealed by a nasty stick that broke when you accidentally stepped on it.

Jim turned and spotted you, looking surprised only a moment before smiling hesitantly. “(Y/N), what brings you out here this late at night?” He asked, friendly. You had the sudden urge to run away, but you quelled it, instead taking a bold step towards him.

“Jim, I’ve come to tell you something, something important that you may already know, but it still needs said.” Your words were surprisingly clear and not slurred, and it emboldened you even more. Jim, for his part, looked concerned and even more guarded.

“What is it (Y/N)?” His words were slow, cautious, and damn him, his responsibility made him all the more attractive.

“Jim, I believe I am, as you humans say, in love. With you. I’ve been infatuated with you for quite some time, and I think over that time it grew into love. And it pains me occasionally that you only see me as a fellow crew-member. I do my best to ignore these emotions, to follow in Spock’s steps and repress the humanity inside me, but I am not as strong as my brother, nor do I wish to be. I like embracing the human part of me. I can accept tomorrow going back to friends, or even simply a captain and a member of his crew if that is what you deem appropriate, but tonight, I needed to admit to these feelings plaguing me.” With a definitive nod, you felt your body relax, your biggest secret finally revealed.

Looking at Jim, it was hard to read the emotions on his face. Really, it was hard to see any emotions on his face; he looked pretty much like a blank slate, which was rather frustrating. In the cool air, your buzz from the alcohol quickly started to fade, allowing embarrassment and shame to creep in. “Forgive me Jim, I overstepped my boundaries. I believe I will return to my quarters.” You started walking away, wanting nothing more than to escape, but Jim’s firm tone stops you:

“Stop (Y/N).” His voice was firm, an order, and while you wanted to just continue moving, disobey, you knew that facing him now would be less painful than facing him back on the ship. With a fortifying breath, you turn around, head held high, deciding to face the mess you’d created straight-on.

Jim sighed and ran his fingers through his hair, looking conflicted and sounding frustrated. “(Y/N) I… I appreciate you coming to me with your feelings. I feel for you something more than friendship or camaraderie, but… You’re Spock’s sister, I’m not sure… I’m not sure that’s a line I can cross. Your brother’s friendship is important to me, and I don’t want to upset him. As much as I care for you, I’m not comfortable moving forward without his permission…. As archaic as that sounds.” He cringed when he said the word “permission” and you understood a whole lot about your interactions with him from his confession.

You took a minute to process his words, then nodded resolutely. “Of course Jim, I understand. Thank you for letting me know that my feelings are at least partially reciprocated. If you feel comfortable broaching the subject with my brother, please do so, but do not feel obligated. We shall resume life as normal tomorrow.” Your words are a bit stiff, but the idea of getting your brother’s permission to pursue Jim is uncomfortable; you love Spock, but he doesn’t fully understand your desire for the type of connection that courting someone brings, and with Jim of all people - illogical, wild Jim - he wouldn’t be too happy about your choice of lover either. Kirk looked like he wanted to say more, but you bid him goodnight and walked back to the small apartment you’d been assigned for the leave.

~~~~

You shake yourself from your reverie and you’re back in your shared quarters, preparing for the gala. Jim’s somewhere else, probably dealing with a last-minute crisis, so you’re alone getting ready, which is something of a relief. [The dress](https://i.pinimg.com/originals/89/39/8f/89398f3f2d2b7319a5d85acf4d1bd8b7.jpg) that hangs on the back of the closet door is daunting, beautiful in a way that you feel you don’t match. Jim bought you the dress though, because you’d fallen in love when trying it on, and he is not in the practice of denying you things you want, as much as he is able.

You shower and do your makeup, something simple that you learned from one of the crew members specifically for this event. Staring at the dress, you take a fortifying breath before deciding to brave putting it on. Just as when you first tried it on, it fits your body perfectly, and, taking in your appearance, you almost don’t recognize yourself- your ears are a reminder though, of who you are, where you come from, and your differences. Half-Vulcan, half-human, toeing the line.

Before your thoughts can go any further, there’s a knock at your door and once you give the all-clear, Jim pops his head in, letting out a low whistle of appreciation when he sees you in your full gala attire.

“Damn (Y/N), you’re more stunning in that than I remember. I might have to fight some men tonight,” Jim says, walking fully into the room, and it’s all you can do to keep a straight face.

“Jim, don’t you dare fight anyone, especially over me.” You scold, but Jim just smirks and winks before walking to the closet to get himself ready for the event.

“I make no promises my dear, but I’ll be on my best behavior. Your brother wouldn’t let me cause too much trouble anyway.” Jim’s teasing helps you relax a bit, and you admire him as he gets dressed in his suit, looking dapper as always. With him by your side, you just might be able to conquer the gala.

~~~~

This shore leave is less relaxation and more, as Jim calls it, schmoozing with the important people of Starfleet, trying to drum up funding for further exploratory efforts. It’s your first time in a long time being at a formalwear event, and you’re a bit self-conscious. You remind yourself not to tug at your dress or fiddle with your jewelry, because you refuse to seem unsure in front of others. After years of teasing for being half-human and half-Vulcan, you’ve learned a thing or two about interacting with people, and how they often sniff out weaknesses before trying to truly be friendly. 

Sitting at a table alongside Jim is the saving grace of the gala, where everyone seems to be uptight and overly-formal. It is uncomfortable how often you’re getting stared at, especially with Jim by your side, and you notice the whispers being exchanged. Jim must notice too, because as a slow song comes on, and pairs rise from their chairs, converging on the dance floor in close couplings, Jim smiles and stands, then holds his hand out to you, an invitation to dance. When you accept and stand gracefully from your seat, he runs his thumb along your knuckles, a gentle caress that sends chills along your skin. Jim holds you at a respectable distance, not too far but also not inappropriately close, as you two sway together. It’s calming and comforting, being like this with Jim, when everything is usually chaotic.

Jim is basically cheek-to-cheek with you, just briefly, but it’s enough to heat up your entire body, out of both embarrassment and arousal, and you have to stifle a moan when he presses a soft kiss to your ear before he takes a step back, returning to that respectable distance you started at. He’s smirking, looking proud as he takes in your reaction, and he winks.

“Don’t worry darlin’, nobody saw, except maybe your brother. As much as he respects us being together, he’s worried I’m gonna do something to harm you.” Jim scoffs at the idea and you smile softly at him, reaching up and stroking his cheek.

“I’m his sister, and he and I have been through a lot, Jim. He loves you and knows you won’t cause me harm on purpose. He’s more worried I’ll cause trouble, or you’ll incite an incident.” Returning your hand to his arm, you give it a squeeze and wink back at him, teasing.

“The only incidents I’ll incite, dear, are ones involving you and some private one-on-one time.” His comment can be easily construed as lewd, but you know better, know he simply means time together and away from the prying eyes of your brother and the rest of the fleet.

“One-on-one time seems to be exactly what the doctor ordered.” You tease back, and Jim lifts your hand to kiss the tips of your fingers.


End file.
